The madness of Laila Fothergill

This is not a play by Alan Bennett. This is real life. If it were the former, it would be very clever, highly amusing and worth watching. As it’s the latter it’s rather sad, and yet still bizarrely amusing at times. Mum has Alzheimers although she doesn’t know it yet, and she isn’t ready for a care home, but she is having some problems with independent living. She has some ‘toys’ who she calls her babies, who she wraps up and keeps warm and feels the need to look after. She also thinks she has several people who she thinks are living in her house. She was recently getting very cross with the ‘woman who was in her bedroom’. This ‘woman’ could be seen in her full-length wardrobe mirror. Mum complained that this woman wore the same clothes, and it was difficult to get her to leave the bedroom. She gets very angry with this woman! The doctor suggested anti-psychotic drugs, but we thought we should try something practical first. So today, I got Toni to meet mother in Tesco’s café, while Barney and I snuck into her house with a couple of rolls of fablon to stick over her wardrobe mirror. We got the deed done, and then I went to meet mum and Toni. We returned to her house for tea and buns. We don’t yet know if mum has seen what we have done to her wardrobe….or if she realises that there is a difference…or what she thinks has happened….but we need to try to make her more content in her world. Is that so bad?

Working well

Busy week at work but very satisfying. My new job seems to be going from strength to strength. It's an amazing twist of fate since I was made redundant last June! Since starting my role as Marketing Co-ordinator, there seems to be an ever increasing amount of work and ideas to keep me well and truly occupied. So much so that I am now being given my own assistant!

My boss, Robin, introduced me to a client this week as the ‘Marketing Manager’. (what’s in a title? Prestige, and perception of importance, that’s what!!) As if that wasn’t enough, today I have moved offices. I started in a little office near to reception (and could hear the incessant, irritating, bimbo-chat), which will now be given over to my assistant, and I get to move into the bigger office on the sunny side (extra benefit) of the building. The office is more than twice as big. Several people stopped by on Friday afternoon to comment and congratulate me on my obvious ‘promotion’ ! They say that size isn’t important, but sometimes it’s good to go large!

In fact, they may have to widen the door on my new extra-large office, just to be able to fit my head through!!

I also had a letter from my boss this week officially thanking me for all my good work so far and especially the hard work I have put in these last few months to develop our new website which has now gone live. It is it fantastic to get official recognition and gratitude from your boss and work colleagues, and all adds to the overall job satisfaction. And as an added bonus, he did also give me a financial bonus!! Yippee. I won’t say how much, suffice to say it’s not enough to start the begging letters, but it is enough to contemplate adding Lydia to my forthcoming skiing holiday plans!!

Of course, I’m still a little concerned at my lack of marketing experience, and the fact that I will be found out, but I seem to be managing to continue bluffing my way so far…… the problem is that my new assistant has quite a bit of marketing experience and some qualifications, so I only hope that she isn’t better at the job than me!!

The Iranian Emperor's new comedy film

On Friday I went to Beverley's cinema club. It's one of those places that shows obscure, foreign films that you wouldn't usually see at the cinema or be able to rent. Usually for good reason, like you wouldn't really want to! I sometimes find that these clubs are a bit like discussing the Emperor's New Clothes*, where everyone thought they should say how lovely the clothes were because that's what all the rich, important and intelligent people were saying (even though they couldn't see anything at all and in fact the Emporer was naked and looking stupid, but no-one was brave enough to say so).

It's my sister Toni who is a member and she can take a guest. I missed the last foreign film and she said it was brilliant. So, tempted by the fact that I may miss something else brilliant, I agreed to go and see the Iranian comedy film**.

Now, my first thoughts were that an Iranian comedy is a contradiction in terms. But, I like to think I'm open minded, and anyway I had nothing else planned and the bar at the cinema club is very cheap. (Damm, I've let slip my true motivation!!).

The film started, and I was disappointed to find that Omid Djalili was no-where to be seen! It was subtitled (obviously) and so we had to move along a couple of seats as Toni was behind a woman with bufty hair and couldn't read the words at the bottom of the screen. (you may well ask, what about the person who was behind Toni??).

I don't know who suggested it was a comedy, but I would like to challenge that description as I didn't find anything remotely funny. If that wasn't bad enough, it was all about FOOTBALL! Yuk. We didn't even get to see lots of fit footballers running around, it was just some girls and soldiers giving their opinions on and commentating on an important football match that was supposedly going on behind the wall of the stadium where they spent virtually the entire film.

After 10 minutes I was doubtful if I would enjoy this film, and from then on it got steadily worse!

Will I be going again?? I may need to think about that very carefully! (after all, there's good telly on a Friday!


*story by H C Anderson - always good to get a Danish reference in!!

** no, I can't remember the name of the film, and can't even be bothered to look it up - believe me, you won't want to see it!

New Wallpaper

For most of us nowadays, if the word 'wallpaper' is mentioned, we would think of what we see on our computer screen! Which reminds me, I must change my Christmas image for something more appropriate!

But let us not forget that real wallpaper is what you stick on the walls of your house. Now, I would like to state that I am NOT a fan of wallpaper. Especially after recently spending energy and frustration scraping it off the walls of my bedroom. However - patterned wallpaper is all the rage at the moment. You can't open a lifestyle magazine or visit a showhouse without being faced by a bold, patterned wallpaper on at least one wall in a room.

So, not to be out done and in my attempt to make my house look gorgeous, contemporary, sophisticated (ok, so I've got a way to go....), I decided to put wallpaper on one wall of my bedroom as part of the overall decorating strategy. I found some nice ones, but then I walked into Habitat before Christmas, saw their new range of designer wallpaper and thought WOW! The cost put me off (£30 a roll), but after my recent decorating efforts in my bedroom, and all the cost cutting methods I had employed (ie., doing it myself!), I decided to splash out on the Habitat wallpaper.

Then, having not ever put up wallpaper before, I also got cold feet about that, so I asked Brian the plumber who had put right my bottom step (see previous post), who is a useful handyman to know and happy to take on jobs other than plumbing.

Yesterday, I got the wallpaper put on the end wall of my bedroom, behind the headboard and over the chimney breast.

The only problem with Brian is that he can sometimes be a little slow and late in actually turning up. On top of that, he's a retained fireman (Driffield do not have any full-time fireman), and carries an emergency bleeper (which sounds like a siron) and can get called at any time. When this happens, he just has to leave what he's doing and go to whatever emergency is happening. If you look at the 3rd photo below - this was the time when Brian did indeed get an emergency call to a chimney fire in a nearby village. Luckly he was only away for an hour, and then came back to finish off my wallpapering!

I knew it would look good, but actually it looks FANTASTIC! I am so pleased with the results. Let me know what you think? The photos don't really do the pattern justice, it has a lot of background patterns which are a contemporary twist on a classic jacquard pattern. It looks much better when you see it close up. Just a couple more things to finish the room and then I think I will live in just my bedroom and never come out!

Festive Holiday

Lots of people have had time off from Christmas to the New Year. I finished work at midday on Friday 21^st December and am back to work on Thursday 3^rd January. That’s ….er….lots of time off! Fantastic!!

So, what could I do? Indulge in a hectic social life….not very realistic! Spend loads of time shopping at the sales and spending loads of money? Tempting but no thanks.

So, I decided to start decorating my bedroom. It’s one of those jobs I’ve wanted to do. I know it would take more than a weekend and I haven’t had the time previously to tackle it. I need to remove the old wallpaper, which is the same stuff that was in my spare room (which I decorated in June), and I knew would proove tough and time-consuming. But once started, there was no going back!

So, I have now scrapped off all old wallpaper, filled in all holes (it’s an old house and best not disturbed really!!), sanded down, painted walls and painted ceiling. I’ve hated doing it all, but I like the results of my hard work. There’s still a bit more to do to make it look gorgeous, but the worst of the work has now been done and I’m so pleased.

The pleasurable part was that Lydia and I got to take a trip to Ikea on 31^st December. We spent several hours there, soaking in the inspiration and being excited by the bargain prices, but the couple of things I wanted to complete my new bedroom we out of stock. Gutted! But….it means I have to go back again – soon!

Christmas Day

What happens first thing on Christmas morning? Do we wake and find lots of presents from Santa? Well, maybe. In my case, shit happens! I go downstairs to find that the bottom step of my staircase is coming away from the wall, and the floor is collapsing, and there appears to have been some long term leak or something that has made the wood underneath rotten. I’m feeling that’s not a good start! At least Santa came down the chimney and not the stairs (otherwise I may have a claim for broken leg)!

As there was not much I could do about the step right on Christmas morning, so I put the oven on instead and thought about cooking the enormous piece of beef we were having for lunch. Later, I will also cook the duck.

I was supposed to put the beef and duck in the shed last night (no room in the fridge) but didn’t and left it out (wrapped) in the kitchen. Hope we don’t get food poisoning! Beef too big to fit in pan, so cut a large piece off the end and put it in the freezer for another time (there are 5 of us eating, not 25!). Having to cook in shifts as can’t get everything in oven at the same time. Beef first 9am – 11am, then cover with foil and leave out to rest (that’s what all the chefs say you should do, but let’s face it what has it been doing that it already needs a rest??). Guests due at 12:30 for lunch. By 12noon, no make-up on, table not laid, starters not done, games not prepared, not vacuumed, no sign of Liddi, aaahhh! Text from Toni – running late, e.t.a. 1pm. Phew! Liddi appears and vacuumes, then helps lay table, and starts preparing bread, cream cheese, smoked salmon. I get myself ready (don’t need any bronzer as looking like a frazzled lobster) and food finished off, take rubbish out to bin, polish candlesticks (should have worn rubber gloves as now my nails are completely black!), search for spanners to tighten wobbly table legs (not found – improvised with adjustable spanner) clear everything away, light the candles…..and relax! Toni, Benji and Mother arrive about 1.15pm. Everything looks prepared and ready (just about).

Soon after they arrived, Mia rang from Canada. It was just before 7am in the morning for her. She got up especially to ring us! Bless. She was off skiing for the day, and then cooking dinner for 16 in the evening. Some people have it easy!!

Try to put on new Christmas CD, but CD player does seem to want to work. Bloody technology. Put the radio on instead.

We took some photos by the Christmas tree to send to distant friends!

Heading towards food time. Get Benji peeling and trimming sprouts and Liddi mixing brandy butter. Kitchen is already looking like morning after a big party, and we haven’t even eaten yet! Duck is out of oven and joins the beef in some resting! Both meats looking and smelling really fabulous. How pleased am I with myself? Get Toni started on making gravy. I have to give her detailed instructions (has she not seen this done a million times??), and we slosh a bit of port in for good measure! Benji now carving the meat – luckily he also watched Jamie Oliver last night on how best to carve a duck!!

Sit down to eat around 3pm: duck, beef, roast potatoes (the best I have ever cooked!), sprouts, broccoli, roast parsnips and carrots, Yorkshire puds, gravy (so delicious you could drink it neat). Pull some crackers, pour more wine, put on our hats, HAPPY CHRISTMAS!

(Later realise that I forgot the red cabbage and mixed veg, but that would probably have been too much anyway). Food is fantastic. Yippee!

Dad called also from California?!. It was morning and sunny and warm. Yorkshire was grey and drizzly! (next year it’s my turn to be away somewhere exciting).

After a long, lazy, delicious lunch, we then watched some TV and later had some mince pies and ice-cream and more wine. Mum got tired and emotional so Benji kindly took her home and we caught up on all the Christmas TV specials.

Isn’t that what Christmas Day is all about?